Wednesday, March 30, 2005


Saturday, February 26, 2005

Angel, series 5

ANGEL Yeah, hell's on earth. Holland manners tried to
sell me that line 3 years ago.
LINDSEY Did you ever prove him wrong?
ANGEL All how you look at the glass. You know, Lindsey,
we can philosophize all night. Hell... (chuckles) We could do it
forever, huh? I don't need to eat, sleep, drink.(sits) How
about you?
LINDSEY (grins) That's what I like to see... the Angel
of yore. Takes no prisoners, suffers no fools. How 'bout this? It's
here. It's been here all along. Underneath. You're just too damn
stupid to see it.
ANGEL (leans forward) See what?
LINDSEY The apocalypse, man. You're soaking in it.
SPIKE I've seen an apocalypse or two in my time. I'd know if one was under my nose.
LINDSEY Not an apocalypse. The apocalypse. What'd you
think, a gong was gonna sound? Time to jump on your horses and fight
the big fight? Starting pistol went off a long time ago, boys. You're
playing for the bad guys. Every day you sit behind your desk and you
learn a little more how to accept the world the way it is. Well,
here's the rub... heroes don't do that. Heroes don't accept the world
the way it is. They fight it.

Friday, February 18, 2005


I know the pieces fit 'cos I watched them fall away
mildewed and smoldering
fundamental differing

pure intention juxtaposed will set two lovers souls in motion
disintegrating as it goes testing our communication
the light that fueled our fire then has burned a hole between us so
we cannot see to reach an end crippling our communication.

I know the pieces fit 'cos I watched them tumble down
no fault
none to blame it doesn't mean I don't desire to
point the finger
blame the other
watch the temple topple over.
To bring the pieces back together
rediscover communication.

The poetry that comes from the squaring off between
And the circling is worth it.
Finding beauty in the dissonance.

There was a time that the pieces fit
but I watched them fall away.
Mildewed and smoldering
strangled by our coveting
I've done the the math enough to know the dangers of a second guessing
Doomed to crumble unless we grow
and strengthen our communication

Cold silence has a tendency to atrophy any sense of compassion

between supposed lovers
between supposed brothers.

And I know the pieces fit.

Tool - Schism

Wednesday, February 16, 2005

The Divine Waters

The Divine waters are to be found in the body.

"It is thus said of the mercury which the wise men seek for, is in mercury. Mercury destroys all foliated Sol: it dissolves and softens it, and takes the soul out of the body. If it be sublimated, then there is made aqua vitae. If any one therefore ask you: What are the stones? You shall answer, that Sol and mercury are the physical stones. But these stones are dead on Earth and operate nothing, but what is by the industry of men supplied to them."

Or answer whatever the hell you like, but that seems to fit the bill.

From the text at The Alchemy Website. This is taken from the tract 'Marsilio Ficino on the alchemical art'. Of course, there's no certainty that Marsi himself wrote this, but the text does contain some pearls. One recommendation I can give any Alchemists out there that for some reason haven't found this already is the tract by Nicolas Flammel. Just to add a little from the tract : "But I erred greatly upwards of 23 years and a half, in labouring without being able to marry the Moon," Well of course you did, so that you could mention the number 23. Welcome to the club of the future dude.

If anyone knows of an Alchemy site that can touch Levity, then please tell me.

Monday, February 14, 2005

Void Meditation

I posted this at Future Hi and I thought I'd post it here aswell :

An attempt to catch some of the Essence of Void Meditation :

Sat in the Lotus position with closed eyes and taking slow, deep breaths. The mind is still on the outer layers of consciousness. Thoughts are flowing through my head, some I cling to, some I don't. Scanning my body and one by one relaxing the parts that are still tense. Lower legs, stomach, shoulders, neck, jaw muscles, anything that needs loosening up. I pass to the next layer and relax further.

Now letting more thoughts go and checking my breathing again. Long, slow breaths, paying attention to the breath going in through the nose and down to the bottom of the lungs. It flows and swirls like a dance of energy, in and out, in, and out again. I move into a deeper state of mind. From here the unity is sensed that holds my body and connects it to the space around me. More subtle, soft light, holding me in place. Stiller now and more focused, shifting from thoughts and into purer perception. Seeing and not thinking. Feeling and not thinking. I pass further.

The grosser layers passed by, or unfolded, the body and mind begin to shift into a greater sense of Oneness. The inner nervous system the seeing organ as feeling catches swirling, pulsating energies, colours and shapes, flowing up and down and around the body. Where it was tingling in places and dull in others before, it now flows in waves. Wave after wave, and then it's just present. Attempts at explanation start to prove inadequate, and the reason why the onus is on experience becomes clear.

The waves of ether, molecules, light, patterns, now sometimes flow, sometimes not. Soft energy like a cool breeze and then clearness, movement then stillness, form and mind. Then deeper, and into the part where words go from inadequate to hardly enough to give a good enough description.

The gross and the subtle are one, each level of consciousness one, inner and outer one. Boundaries between the self and the outer world dissipate and are perceived for the illusions that they are as the mind randomly picks out the activity of the void with a heightened awareness. I'm not just my body anymore because at this point my body is nothing seperate from the surrounding area. Dimensions fuse and I begin to float in the void. Unity is attained, the sense of 'I' fades and ego is transcended. Reality is non-dual.

Here, the Huang Po doctrine of Universal Mind makes perfect sense :

"Men are afraid to forget their own minds, fearing to fall through the void with nothing on to which they can cling. They do not know that the void is not really the void but the realm of the Dharma".(1)

(1) Quote from The Way of Zen, by Alan Watts


Something made with the help of the Hyper ages ago whilst deep in chapel perilous....

> > > HYPERBABY < < <

Sunday, February 13, 2005

Invisible until the end

You made me.

You left me here, alone and transmitting, waiting for you.

The reverse of the Moon, the string in the labyrinth, the way out.

It's only a game.

Try to remember.

I am inside you.

This is the world you made. This nightmare will persist until you wake up.

What will you do?

Fix yourself. The world will follow. Everything will follow.

"As above, so below."

Do you understand? Do you understand what you must do?

"It's not just like some satellite TV shite; it's been there FOREVER and it talks to us : even when we don't hear it, even when we don't answer back, it never gives up on us."


Try to remember.

"We made it to save us."

Saturday, February 12, 2005

Open your Ajna

This is long, but hopefully worth logging/writing here.

Ok, this started with a dream that was at first, one of the worst nightmares I've had in ages, but which now, with the help of Metachor's blog Vortex Egg, seems to be unfolding into something a lot more important than a fearful memory.

I'll start with the dream, next what I found at Vortex Egg, then the further search on the net, something from Cosmic Trigger, and then finally what I think all of this means.

The dream :

I'm in space. I'm being showed what I know but can't explain why I know, is the star/planet Sirius. I include planet there because even though Sirius is a star, I was being showed Sirius as a planet surrounded by fog, and as far as I remember no part of this sphere could be seen because of the fog, or cloud that was surrounding it. What I'm being shown is what appears to be a man making his way to the top of this planet, he's making his way upto the top in a kind of effortless manner, taking huge steps, as if climbing stairs. Anyway, he goes from the halfway point of the planet to the top in seconds, (I say huge steps because the scale of this man is a lot bigger than normal, as if he's a symbolic representation of a man, but I'll get to that further on) and then he goes into the planet beyond the clouds and disappears.

Next thing I see after a pause of what I remember is a second or two, is this man shooting back out from the clouds and darting through space. I turn to see where he's going, and I see Earth. He's going to Earth.

Now let me give a better picture of the scene, because it's no normal space. I'm being shown something here, and here's what I see :

a) Sirius
b) Space
c) Earth
d) Giant man

Now here comes the wierd. Giant man goes to Earth, I'm being shown Sirius/Earth like they are a lot closer than they actually are, like Earth is clearly visible, it's just a little way off in the distance. Still near Sirius and not moving anywhere I get the impression that I'm about to see something else because, well I'm still there. And here it comes. Giant man comes darting back out of Earth, but he's not alone. He's darting back to Sirius with another being who I perceive as being human. They are not friends. In dreams I sometimes know things without being shown, as I believe everyone else does, even if they don't usually remember it, and, I'm going to call him Man 1 from now on instead of giant man, Man 1 and Man 2 who has left Earth with him are enemies. They are darting back to Sirius criss-crossing, like they want to stop and fight but getting back to Sirius is more important. They criss-cross, and I'm sure I either saw or thought of them as going so fast that they where leaving fire trails, all the way to Sirius until they get to it and both of them disappear behind the clouds, or fog.

This is when I know this is a nightmare. Please, if you're reading this : don't read the nightmare bit and then leave thinking this is some sort of doom prophecy, it has a purely optimistic outcome that I've just arrived at. If this was doom and gloom, like it has been in my mind for the last couple of days, I would have refrained from posting it here, or anywhere else on the net.

I know, as soon as they have gone under that cloud that they are not good news for Sirius. I wait for the confirmation, again for a second or two, and then it arrives. They have crashed into the surface, they must have done because there is the biggest thundering boom, one that is making me cringe as I write this, and then my point of perception is cast away from Sirius and back towards Earth, but I'm still watching Sirius to see what the hell has just happened, to see if anything else happens. It does aswell. Now comes the next thing that I see after Sirius itself, space, Earth, Man 1 and Man 2 : a silvery ocean that is underneath Sirius and that stretches out all the way back to Earth and all over the part of space that I can see. Sirius then starts falling, it falls and it falls and then it crashes into this ocean. The ocean I'm describing here is what I was perceiving at the time to be a primordial ocean, the first waters, the 5th dimensional fluid that Grant Morrison describes, and the horror that I'm seeing is Sirius falling into it after these two men have literally hit it that hard that it has fallen out of space. It hits the ocean, and the biggest ripple goes out from it, a ripple that I know is so high it is unreal, and this ripple, or shockwave, is heading for Earth.

The dream ends. I'm in such a state of shock in the dream that I know (or think) I'm dead if I don't get out of there, and I wake up.

So that's all I had at that point, and I was gutted obviously, a nightmare like that and I have nothing. I can't understand why the hell the universe has decided to inflict it on me and I'm lost for any way of seeing any meaning in it. I push it out of my mind and leave it well alone. Then, a short while ago I was at Vortex Egg, and here Metachor has an entry on Hopi Elder prophecies, and what do I find? This :

"And this is the Ninth and Last Sign: You will hear of a dwelling-place in the heavens, above the earth, that shall fall with a great crash. It will appear as a blue star. Very soon after this, the ceremonies of the Hopi people will cease."

I went straight into a type of shock and thought instantly of the dream. A dwelling place in the heavens, a blue star, that shall fall with a great crash. This was crazy, why was I thinking of the dream? The prophecy is symbolic, and here I am sat there and this dream has come back into my head. So I go straight to Google, and I think I entered a search with something like 'Hopi prophecy' I looked and saw the same thing repeated, so then I googled something like 'Hopi prophecy blue star.' And found this :

An ancient Hopi Indian prophecy states, "When the Blue Star Kachina makes its appearance in the heavens, the Fifth World will emerge". This will be the Day of Purification. The Hopi name for the star Sirius is Blue Star Kachina. It will come when the Saquasohuh (Blue Star) Kachina dances in the plaza and removes his mask.

I think the first site I saw it at was here, when I saw this I felt like crap. I couldn't believe that I'd had this dream, and then I'd arrived at this. I sat there feeling a little ill for a bit and then I remembered that Pahana, the lost white brother will return to guide humanity into the fifth world, and something else from Cosmic Trigger. On Pahana here's something from the same entry at Vortex Egg :

"These are the Signs that great destruction is here: The world shall rock to and fro. The white man will battle people in other lands -- those who possessed the first light of wisdom. There will be many columns of smoke and fire such as the white man has made in the deserts not far from here. Those who stay and live in the places of the Hopi shall be safe. Then there will be much to rebuild. And soon, very soon afterward, Pahana will return. He shall bring with him the dawn of the Fifth World. He shall plant the seeds of his wisdom in our hearts. Even now the seeds are being planted. These shall smooth the way to the Emergence into the Fifth World."

Pahana bringing the dawn of the Fifth World means that in the prophecy a new world will follow on after the blue star prophecy, so it's obviously not at any point some stupidly big apocalyptic horror like my dream was, but was it supposed to be showing something that bad? Robert Anton Wilson has this to say in Cosmic Trigger :

"Dr Douglas Baker, in a lecture, said that Sirius is the Ajna center of a galactic being and our sun is the Heart center. Our planetary evolution depends on raising the energy from the Heart (our sun) to the Ajna (Sirius)."

This is something that handed me a brighter and more optimistic outcome to the dream. What I originally saw as Sirius crashing and sending a ripple through a primordial ocean that was on it's way to engulf Earth wasn't apocalyptic as far as I see it, it was purely symbolic of Humanities situation. The Ajna chakra is our perception, and ability to perceive clearly. In general, our present situation as a race is not one of seeing clearly. The dream that I had showed me the negation of perception. It showed me firstly a man making his way to the top, then fighting, then destruction. This I believe was our first attempt as a race, to perceive, and what it has so far led us to is in general, people in power seeking conquest, then war, and then destruction. What has come out of it is the desire (in those of us who don't want part of a destructive course of events for Earth and Humanity) for change, awakening, a clear perception, and I think that the shockwave coming from the primordial, silvery ocean was us. Remember that I'm taking the dream as symbolic and not literally, I don't actually believe that we are from Sirius.

The dream was symbolizing Sirius as the brightness, the illumination, our collective Ajna, not falling but putting in motion an energy wave that is coming back to Earth as higher awareness. Collective intuition has started to draw that higher awareness and it's reaching us. Not as a few individuals, but collectively.

Sirius never fell. There was no Sirius. Instead our collective Ajna sensed the futility of war and sent waves of higher energy through the unconscious that are now starting to surface on Earth.

Higher awareness is coming back to Earth to try and change it for the better. That awareness is what has been effected after all of the trouble on Earth, and it is the first stirrings of clear perception for us as a whole. What I'd like to believe is that the dream I had was symbolizing the next step in our evolution, the Fifth World of the Hopi.